In the course that I am doing to improve my coaching, one of the questions that is asked involves negativity. How negative people around you have an influence on your mood and the way you see life.
As I was thinking about an answer to the question I thought of how a negative partner can influence the whole marriage and the couple’s outlook on the world around them.
At the moment the people in South Africa that one meets are very negative and pessimistic about the future. They lack hope and only see darkness and gloom. This definitely has an influence on general life in the country and especially influences many families.
It is almost impossible to live every day with a sword hanging over your head. You have at times to see the bright side of life. There are so many things happening around us that we can be thankful for.
In marriage, if one of the partners is constantly negative and only sees darkness, then there is going to be a toll on the marriage. Marriage is a union of two people who are there for each other and who support each other. If one of the partners is negative, it is going to rub off on the other partner and their children, cause arguments about being positive, cause the marriage to be very strained and maybe even lead to a divorce.
There is a big need for the couple to be positive about the future and see the bright side of things. In fact, there is nothing that either of them can do about the present or the future. Being positive is what marriage is about. The’ better or for worse’ part must be accepted with the good times.
When one gets married there is nothing that promises that everything will go well and that life together will always be a bed of roses. Hard times will come, either in the situation that you are living in at the time or in the actual civic circumstances. None of this can be changed but what can change is the way you see things. We all get pushed down at times and sometimes struggle to come up again, but that is why marriage is a partnership of two people so that the one can help the other.
If you are negative, stop for a moment and think why you are negative and what effect this is having on those around you. Try and always look at the positive of a situation and how you can grow from it.